Posted 5:20 PM by Scoobie Davis

Quiz for Right-Wingers
Here is the question, Mr. or Ms. Right-Winger: Suppose there is a guy—let’s call him Scoobie. His accomplishments in Hollywood include some low-level production work for a documentary film (so low-level that he isn’t mentioned in the Internet Movie Database). He is writing a fictional screenplay and is trying to find funding for a documentary film that he wants to make. He works part-time as an extra. Scoobie goes to a lot of Hollywood parties. Here’s the question: Would it be ethically permissible for Scoobie to refer to himself as “a movie producer” when he introduces himself to attractive women at these parties? Explain why or why not it would be ethical for Scoobie to do this. You have one minute for an answer. You are not allowed to look for an answer in The Book of Virtues by William Bennett.

Answer: No, it is not ethically permissible for Scoobie to do this. Reasons: First, there are enough poseurs in Hollywood; one more is one too many. Second, when describing oneself to a woman, stretching the truth a little is okay, even expected. Embellishment in the pursuit of babe action is no vice. However, if you aren’t producing anything, you ain’t a producer. Wanting to produce movies doesn't make a guy Steven Spielberg.

The reason for the quiz: when George W. Bush ran for Congress in 1978, he listed his occupation as “oil producer.” The thing is that he never produced any oil—zero, zip, nada. As I told Rush a couple years ago, "the only oil George Bush saw at that time was the oil that he put on his salad." (Okay, that was unfair--I'm sure it was a servant who put the oil on Bush's salads). I bring this up because, in the wake of Al Gore’s decision not to run in 2004, Michael Barone, in an otherwise thoughtful piece, rehashes the stale right-wing attack: “Mr. Gore had the habit of taking plausible arguments and exaggerating them to the point of unbelievability--he actually was interested early in the Internet, but he didn't invent it. Natural politicians have an instinct that protects them from such self-defeating tactics. Mr. Gore, like Nixon, lacked that instinct.” Give me a break, do I have to explain this one more time? I’m not even going to bother. Oh, by the way, in the responses section for this article, a reader rehashed the Love Story lie that wasn’t a lie.